The Power of a One-Word Switch

For too long, I used the wrong three-letter word with my students. And my feedback to them kept swerving off course.

“Your plot points are clever,” I told Kareen after reading her story.

But she didn’t seem to hear me. It was as if she was tensed for what might come next.

This happened again when I complimented Jason on showing up on time for three days in a row and when I thanked Blake for an insightful comment in class.

So I began listening to myself. And I heard the pattern—that after my positive critique, I usually continued with the same three-letter word.  

“But your dialogue is stilted,” I told Kareen, “too formal.”

To Jason: “But last-week’s makeup work is still missing.”

And to Blake: “But your writing needs to show this level of insight.”

My intent was to invite students to greater growth.

Instead, by my word choice, I undercut my approval and their confidence.

A simple swap of two three-letter words made the difference. Shoulders no longer slumped and chins went up.

“You did a great job on that project last week,” I began saying to students. “And you might want to polish it even more by including a few quotes from experts.”

The use of but focuses on the mistake—negating the great job. The word and brings a different connotation. It upholds the good, points the way toward even more of the right stuff, and gives students the sense that you are on their team.

Although but has its place (as you can see in this post), I’ve found that switching to and helps students see feedback as a gift.